100 posts! 100 posts!

this should be some sort of memorable entry, but it won't be. it will be positively mundane and ordinary because i can't think of a single thing to write about that is really 100th-post-worthy. so, i guess that means that the comment section of the 100th post better be kick-ass entertaining, yes?

go to it. comment. enlighten. amuse. commemorate.

the closer?

is on tonight. in about eight minutes. why are you reading this? go watch it!!!!

let's make fun of other people, shall we?

and no, smartasses, that is NOT my picture (i can already hear w. and others plotting out the comments before they've read the first word).

it's been awhile since i was absolutely just flat-out bitchy and mean and rude and holier-than-thou and snobby here (in life, i think it's been maybe 3 hours, give or take). i've been a kinder, gentler kim. but then, i saw something on myspace that just REQUIRED me to embrace my true self. it would be criminal to let this gem slide by without sharing it with those who will appreciate it as much as i did.

so, with that, please take a moment to check out the photo at right, or view the complete profile entitled: Lord Have Mercy, Mom Got Her Blue Jeans On . the user in the photo is named cassandra, she's 37, and she lives in the carpet capital of the world, dalton, ga.

Disclaimers:

1. i did not commit that unfortunate little syntax error in the title--she did. i find it amusing, though, since it completely changes the meaning of the title. and frankly, i think god may have had to intervene to make those jeans button...at least the god of lycra.

2. i don't know this person. she is the friend of a particularly skeevy man who messaged me via myspace to tell me that i 'have sexy eyes'. again, amusing since i have sunglasses on in my profile, but i guess he looked at my photo albums, which gives me hives. and the urge to use clorox on my eyes.

3. be sure to read the comments on the picture if you have a myspace account. they add to the merriment.

Commentary:

1. note the belly tatoo. i say that as if you could possibly miss it.

2. note that her shirt almost looks as if it, too, is some sort of weird full-torso tatoo.

3. note that the socks absolutely MAKE that outfit, don't you think. i can't even imagine what shoes she is going to use to accessorize.

4. note the odd, symmetrical, a-cat-tried-to-climb-her-thighs claw mark runs front and center. why? love of god, WHY would those be put there intentionally? and i can't even discuss the bleached skid marks highlighting her thighs.

5. note that this woman is younger than i am, yet looks old enough to be buggy's older cousin.

6. note the decorative broom in the background and please tell me wtf it has adorning it?

7. note the presence of a white, plastic pool chair in the extreme right of the photo. wouldn't you crop out the use of exterior plastics if you were posting a picture of your home on the internet? yes????

then, if you can stand it? you can go check out what i'm going to refer to as Cassandra: Lady in Red and again, myspace users, the comments from other users absolutely MAKE this one.

i'd offer more commentary, but frankly, i don't have that kind of time.

goodreads.com

if you like books and/or read books, you? should go set up a profile at goodreads.com and then? you should add me to your friends list (if you can't tell, the word ME is a link. click it).

dave is the one who introduced me to it---like a myspace for bookfolks. just reading through people's book lists and finding old favorites or 'must reads' has been ridiculously entertaining to me, but then again, i'm rather socially-challenged like that.

go. join. add.

yo.

• that's really all i got.
• the closer is about to premier. i love the closer.
• i missed the first epi of top chef: miami. pisses me off, stupid dvr and stupid digital cable that doesn't 'see' bravo for some effed up reason.
• i am thru with summer school as of today. going back down to work in my room for a bit tomorrow evening, but that's MY choice, no kids, my time. the way i like it.
• i am having surgery of the knee a week from tomorrow--at least i think it is. that's the 26th, right? i'm totally out of it.
• mr. kim is taking anatomy and physiology this summer---i've not felt so dumb in a long, long time as i did when i tried to help him review. me? not so much a science girl. i know, you're shocked.
• i forgot that once upon a time, i was almost a mod at OT. talk about a flashback--ayak posted about it and it was like, 'hey! that's me!!' and can i just say, the drama from that year? not the mod stuff, but the rest of it? gah. live and learn and become a better person.
• and may i also just add that based on a post sunday night that nearly sent me into frigging coronary arrest, i'm GLAD i don't have to watch my tone or worry about 'playing favorites' there as a mod. argh....flames and steam are shooting from my head right now.
• sam hs been having me 'act out scenes' with him on the digital camera. in this scene, he is 'tarzan' and i'm supposed to be alternately puzzled and then scared. i'm not sure WHAT his looks were, but they sure are cute.
  
  
  

public service announcement

or should that be 'pubic' service announcement?

while undies that are constructed in the manner of pants and, as such, have a seam running down the middle of the crotch might sound like a good idea or even something you wouldn't think you'd notice, it turns out there is more to it than just another seam. not such a comfy idea. i mean, sure they LOOK really cute when you're standing up and looking in a mirror, but walking, sitting and just generally functioning? yeah, not so cute. especially if one is at work and has limited ability to adjust underwear, especially around one's girl parts.

one word survey for you, so do it!

goofy one from myspace, but it's all about me, so that's always good, right? if you read it, you must answer it--either in comments or on your blog. even if you've already done it, dammit. play along, play along.

1. Where is your cell phone?
car

2. You're single/taken?
taken

3. Your hair?
short

4. Your mother?
smoker

5. Your father?
geologist

6. Your favorite thing?
cheese

7. Your dream last night?
forgotten

8. Your favorite drink?
zin

9. Your dream car?
free

10. The room you're in?
sunroom

11. Your ex?
navy

12. Your fear?
water

13. Where were you last night?
online

14. what you're not?
domestic

15. Muffins?
nah

16. One of your wish list items?
vehicle

17. The last thing you did?
ate

18.What are you wearing?
stripes

19. Your pet or pets?
emma

20. Your computer?
laptop

21. Your life?
improving

22. Your mood?
exhausted

23. Missing some one?
yes

24. Your car?
junky

25. Your work?
hellish

26.Like someone?
married

27. Your favorite color?
navy

28. When is the last time you laughed real hard?
sarah's

29. Crush's first name?
rob

30. Dream job?
writer

what would you do differently?

with all the graduations and such right now, i was asked what i would do differently if i could go back and have a do over from graduation forward. interesting. i made some incredibly STUPID choices along the way to becoming an 'adult', so yeah, i'd like to think i could do better next time around, although i suppose all those 'choices' made me a better person in the long run. but, to play along, here goes:

1. put some thought into choosing a major or just be 'undecided' for a year. i wasted time swapping around for two years.

2. realize the importance of college in relation to job-related experiences and take advantage of more of them.

3. enjoy college for what it was and leave high school and that drama behind.

4. in relation to 3, dump the high school boyfriend before i got there. for both our sakes.

5. in relation to 3, don't try to make old friends and old boyfriends into something they aren't and just calm the hell down.

6. go abroad for junior year

7. live on my own longer

8. exercise better judgement in social situations

9. don't eat so freaking much crap food

10. appreciate and enjoy every minute of college.

all in all, i cannot complain, really. i had a great experience, i made lifelong friends, i 'traveled' (chattanooga, virginia, connecticut, gatlinburg, lmao) with friends and had great times, i ended up with a fantastic job, i met my husband...it's all good in the end, right?

poor, poor paris...

i'm one of the first people to get on her soapbox when there is some sort of miscarriage of justice. really, i am. but i'm having a hard time feeling too much sympathy for paris in her latest publicity whore moment.

see, i know that it's wrong for someone to be punished more harshly because of who they are. i really do, but dammit, i also have to say that it's refreshing to see someone who is white, rich and famous actually have to take her punishment like anyone else would because newsflash: there are unfair sentences passed down every day across this country. it's one of the little 'glitches' in the legal system that we value so much. so, so sorry paris, that you get to be the whipping girl, but in the grand scheme of things 23 or 40 days is a damn sight better than a life sentence.

this is what happens when you try make your career out of being rich, famous, 'hot' and outrageous. you have to be prepared to pay for it. and she is. hopefully she'll come out of this or at least less visible.

procrastinator extroidonaire

i'm in absolute slug mode, which is condition normal, i have to admit. my house? a fricking wreck. my classroom? oy. it needs a separate post, but it was rained in again yesterday and i've got a pile of stuff to deal with. my van? must be cleaned.

and here i am, sitting on the couch, blogging.

i'm leaving for chattanooga/japser tomorrow right after work. i am spending two nights away from home. sam is going to spend the night with sil. this means clothing and such should be packed into some sort of recepticals. nothing is, of course. in fact, the gym bag i took with me last weekend? has yet to be unpacked.

i don't want to actually DO anything. must snap out of it--have lovely, visit with old friends, hang with my mom and aunt plans for wednesday-friday, but i'm guessing that wearing the same clothes all three days and not putting on any makeup or deodorant would probably mar those experiences somewhat.

am off. to pack. seriously. has to be done. am on it. right now. in a minute. just need to check my email......

and thus, we decorated

i do love anna--she's my little sister from sigma kappa back in college. i've not seen her in forever and a day. life, you know. but we met for dinner (I was really late because i seem to have this recurring problem with eastern time, whcih is rather foriegn to me) and then went for more drinks in the bar.

i need to drag out the old college photos for comparison, lol, but she hasn't changed a bit. me, well, i'm looking significantly more haggard and using three times the amount of eye makeup--seriously, wtf?

anna and me

we had a blast just talking and laughing (loudly) and remembering old times (Cary, I'm sure you remember the road trips to UTC and get this, my 'friend' that puked his guts up out the window of our apartment? the one that gave me the roses and the one that made me miss that sig kap ceremony, etc. well, he? is a freaking judge now--so i'm not about to post his name. a judge, lmao. it ain't easy bein' cheesy).

oh, and just because. for dinner, i had meatloaf (my favorite 'real' food), but since i loaded up on chips and jalepeno spinach cheese dip (yes, i, the person who loathes three of those four ingredients ate said dip), i didn't eat much. i got a to-go box for the rest because it seemed shameful to waste it; however, since we were still out and about, i had to put it in my purse. thankfully i have a large purse, but let me tell you folks. you know your frigging old when you're out at a bar and when you go to pay your tab you have to take meatloaf out of your purse. the leftovers:

i swear, this looked much better IRL, too, rather like my eye makeup did. not that my eye makeup resembled meatloaf, but in the fact that both suffered in the photo process.

yeah, i'm done. good night.

shaking it off

me? i'm going to go out and play pool with my little sister from college, anna. well, i'm not going to actually PLAY becuase I don't know how. anna says we will be decoration. i think i can handle that part.

have a great night, friends.

and some days?

i don't really feel like much at all. why is it that we can never stay on a 'happy' plane for very long? or at least, me?

life. it IS chock full of suck sometimes.