Various Things that Piss Me Off

If you list them, they might go away...at the very list, they are flushed from your brain for a while:

1. Ignorant people. I seem to be surrounded by them on message boards where debating is involved lately (research is apparently a dirty word as are logic, tolerance, reason and compromise). I can understand not knowing everything about all things...well, at least I can relate to the concept ;-)... but I cannot and will not every understand why some people are perfectly happy with being willfully ignorant about the most basic things about their fellow man and then not only being stubborn about that, but also being flauntingly, defiantly PROUD of the fact that they don't know shit from shinola about diddly for whatever zealot, xenophobic, homophobic, edcuationophobic, politophobic, vaccineophoibic, fill-in-your-phobic, conspricacy-threorist, bad science reason. Oh, and then, just for shits and giggles, they like to insult those who think by calling them names because that's what those who are intelligent do, I suppose.
2. Humidity. Seriously. Fuck global warming. I'm tired of hearing about that--global humidity is the more serious problem.
3. Political ads. When I'm rich, I am going to spend scads of money running policital parody ads to offer some relief for those like me who are tired of seeing these grinning chimps blather on about how they are going wrap themselves in barbed wire, kill all the turrists, stop abortions, pay all the teachers a gazillion dollars, eliminate taxes and make big bidness pay for it all while they protect "real families" and the flag from the bums who've been running the state or the country so far.
4. Dumbass ammendments. I think that the next ammendment should be to preserve the sanctity of Apple Pie. They've screwed baseball up, we have unwed mothers *gasp*, but I think we can all get behind Apple Pie and quit putting g.d. artificial sweetner in it.
5. Fat chicks in skimpy clothes . I get to rant about this because I can talk about my own kind--you? are not allowed if you wear clothes that don't have double digits in the size, of course, but I can say this with complete and total freedom: Put your fat ass inside your shorts--the top of them AND the bottom of them. Pack your boobs in a bra that fits (and by God, you better have on a bra). Get some sleeves that cover your arms and all parts of them that hang out and all around--that means NO tank tops and NO cap sleeves and have enough length on your shirt that we don't see anything that the top of those shorts might have missed when you are standing still OR when you raise your arms. If your shirt is acting, in any way, as a girdle or method of contrstaining, then you have bought it too small and it has to be tossed. If you lean over and anything larger than a baseball could be dropped down the cleavage opening, then the shirt is too low cut. I don't care how cute your tatoos are--no one wants to see them if they are undulating along rapids of fat on the river of pudge, so either tone it up or cover it up.
6. Summer television. I cannot remember when anything comes on, I hate almost all of it anyway, save The Closer and Project Runway (must set DVR for PR). I think it's a sign that I'm getting old, maybe. Who knows.
7. Purple fur. Another sign that I'm getting old--Wal Mart was chock frigging full of it. Who the hell would decorate with purple fur?
8. Tunics. I think it's time this look was over, but I have a feeling we're going to be in full-tunic this fall. I'm sure that I won't be since a would be most hideous on me.
9. Legos. This one isn't new, but I've stepped on so many more of them lately that I just had to add them .
10. Star Jones. Already posted, but I saw her in a magazine or two while I was waiting for Sam's surgery to be over (it went well--it's on his webpage), and her arrogance/spin/total divaness just pisses me off to no end. Why is she famous and I'm not? How the hell does this happen? Is it the legal degree, the ethnicity or the name? I'd be willing to change my name to something more cheezy if needed and I have a nice advanced degree even if it isn't quite as glitzy....I'm screwed on the race, but I do have a varied and interesting heritage, albeit Anglo-European as all get out, but there are Pilgrims and even a wee bit of royalty...surely that makes me somewhat marketable if Star Jones can be famous.
11. Dirt. My house is full of it and unless a tornado comes along and sweeps it and the junk that is damming it up, I've no choice but to go deal with it because a week from today, my blessed summer vacation ends. Forget what I said about wanting to go back to work. I wasn't properly medicated or something. I'm not.